Sleeping Arrangements

Posted on | January 14, 2010 | 1 Comment

I sleep in the nursery. There. I said it. And you know what? I’m not ashamed! My doctor seems to think I should be mortified to still be sleeping in the same room with my child. My husband can’t believe I won’t return to our bedroom. But you know what? I work all day long. I see my precious, adorable J from 6pm until 8am. If I don’t sleep in there, I only see him from 6pm til 7:30pm and then again from 6:30am until 8am. That’s just not enough time for me. I’m selfish. I want to spend every minute I can with my son so that his first words aren’t “Who are you?”

Maybe I’m being irrational, but I think I would miss him terribly if I didn’t have that little bit of time at night to snuggle with him. And you know what? I think he’d miss me, too. Night time is OUR time. It’s when we get to do some bonding without the hustle and bustle of trying to get ready for school or trying to get ready for bed.

He does go to sleep in his crib almost every night. But when he wakes up around midnight or one, I just put him in the bed with me. Let the judgment begin. I seriously don’t care. I love his little face when he realizes I’m not going to put him back down. I love waking up to the little stretch and smile that he does when he sees me in the morning. I refuse to give that up.

Does it hurt my back? Absolutely. Do I wake up in positions I never knew were possible due to his 16 pounds somehow taking up the majority of the bed? Sure. Do I care one bit? Nope.

Besides that, I’m pretty sure I get more sleep this way than I would if I were sleeping across the hall with one ear tuned in to the monitor all night. It’s not like I’m sleeping curled up in a ball on the floor in his room. And I’m not trying to fit in the crib with him. So what’s the big deal with me sleeping in a bed in his room and why do people seem to think they should give me all these reasons why I shouldn’t? I thought the advice-mongers would slow down after pregnancy, but that was just wishful thinking. They get worse. I even had one relative of my husband’s who told me that no matter what I had heard, it WAS possible to spoil a baby and I had to be sure not to give in to him. She commented that J was a “big boy” and that probably meant I was giving in and feeding him more than I should. She’s off the Christmas Card list and lucky I had gotten sleep the night before or she might be off the planet. As it were, I just smiled and said “Oh, that’s nice of you to say. We love him, too.” She looked confused which is obviously a state she’s familiar with.

As a side bar, J is cutting his first tooth. He’s not even 5 months yet. I checked my baby book though and apparently I cut my first tooth around this time, too. He’s a beast to be around right now because he either wants to be eating or to have something in his mouth.

I did manage to send him to daycare with three full bottles today in order to avoid the dreaded comment sheet I got yesterday. “J only had 4.5 ounces in his last bottle. I think J was still hungry when he finished eating but we had no more food for him.” I can’t imagine that half an ounce made that much difference to the boy, but God help me if I sent him without 15 ounces again. In order to do that, I had to feed him at 6, pump at 7, and drop him off at daycare with the knowledge that he was going to tap into one of those bottles only thirty minutes later. If this keeps up, I’m going to have to make my mother in law a happy woman and put J on formula.

Anyhow. It’s back to the grind today. I got myself a lovely soy chai latte from Starbucks although it took almost 20 minutes to get. Apparently they had a bar broken and were working from one coffee bar rather than two. That was information I could have used before Miss Teen America swiped my gift card. Instead, she took my order, swiped my card, and said “Now it’s going to be a while because we only have one bar. Is that okay?” I thought about saying “No, that’s not okay. Please re-credit my gift card.” But since I felt certain that the manager was the older guy sweating his balls off trying to make coffee for all the inside and drive-thru patrons, I abstained. I wanted to get back at Teen America, but knew that if I tried to get my money back poor sweaty manager would have most certainly had to stop making coffee in order to dry Teen America’s tears and swipe a manager card, probably all the while giving me some kind of death ray stare. Since I didn’t want to be responsible for the Great Starbucks Riot of 2010, I just smiled, hefting up the carseat full of my sleeping son, and said “sure. That’s fine,” like I didn’t obviously have better things to be doing than the three teenage girls giggling in front of me (who got their coffees faster) or the older couple in matching sweat suits in the corner (who also got theirs faster). [Side note… never knew so many people drank Soy Chai Lattes. Especially here in Macon, GA!!!] By the time I got my latte I was pretty annoyed until a young black guy leaned over and opened the door for me on my way out and said “Your baby is really adorable. Have a wonderful day.”

*sigh* Humanity can be kind. He made my day. He was also the recipient of my first and potentially only smile of the day. Thanks random guy at Starbucks! Let that be a lesson to you… you never know what your actions might do for someone else. He made me 50% less likely to think evil thoughts about Teen America all day. Okay… maybe 30%…


One Response to “Sleeping Arrangements”

  1. km.ward
    March 20th, 2010 @ 5:12 am

    I am a first time reader and am just trying to catch up on your bloging, so that is why I am commenting on such an old post….I am also a 30 year old new mom *and* working mom….I hear ya, sister!
    I wanted to comment on your sleeping with your son….YOU ROCK!!!! all those naysayers(sp?) can kiss my ass! I slept with my daughter until she was 5 months….and I would have kept doing it but she's an acrobate when she sleeps 🙂 so had to move her into her own bed *pout*
    I want to thank you for having the common sense and itelligence to listen to your instincts and your heart! Here's to snuggling our little bundles of woderfulness(is that a word?) as we drift away together in our dreams.
    I'm a big fan of your blog!
    All the best
    Vancouver, Canada

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