Boys Will Be Boys

Posted on | March 11, 2013 | 11 Comments

One of the things I wanted to be sure to do with J while he was young was instill in him the importance of believing in something bigger than him.  As a result, once we got back to Macon, we started going to Wednesday night supper at a local church.  Two of his friends from daycare go there as well and they wrestle around during dinner and then take off for children’s choir.  It’s adorable and he’s learned a lot of cute songs that he’ll toss out at random times.  I’ve been pretty proud of myself for remembering to integrate him into a church family and his little songs have been like individual pats on the back for me.

But when you’re dealing with preschoolers, even the most innocent and sincere of concepts, if left to wander, can become a method of torture.

When I picked J up from visitation weekend, we went to PetSmart and then to Target, just to have a little time together outside of the house.  Usually when we run errands, I’m in a hurry so I’m constantly rushing J along the aisles with a lot of “Come on” and “put that down” and “not now.” This time, I decided we had no where to be and no time constraints, so I tucked away my clock and my impatience and followed him through the stores.  He had a great time… without me rushing him, he got to push all the buttons on all the toys, touch all the aquarium decorations, and look at every animal three times.  When we’d finished looking through the toys, we made our way up to the front of the store to pick up a few things I needed (like coffee).

As we navigated the aisles, he started singing, softly at first and then getting increasingly brave with his voice.

“Praise him, praise him! Praise him in the morning, praise him in the noontime…”

It was adorable and I was beaming.  I couldn’t have been prouder of him in that moment, singing his little worship song in his sweet little boy voice.  I looked around, to see if other people noticed how perfectly I was parenting my child.  He was well behaved and adorable and dammit, he was singing songs about Jesus!!  He quickly realized he could substitute other words with success when he pointed at a box of poptarts and told me they were tasty then began to sing “Tasty! Tasty! Tasty in the Morning, tasty in the noon time.”

I’ll admit, I laughed hard.  It was adorable, and it garnered a few smiles from passing customers who probably remembered the worship tune from their own childhoods.  My laughter was encouragement and he sang louder, grinning back at me and almost skipping down the aisle before me.  It’s those moments of pride that get us… the moments when we encourage outsiders to witness our awesome parenting. It’s in those moments that our children turn on us, becoming the crazy, demanding, mini-people that we briefly forgot they were.

And then it happened.  Somewhere Jesus let out a very loud guffaw, I’m sure, though whether it was at J’s newest verse or the shade of purple that I blushed from forehead to foot.  There ahead of me, my sweet well-churched preschooler was singing at the top of his sweet lungs:

“PRAISE BOOB! PRAISE BOOB! BOOBIE IN THE MORNING, BOOBIE IN THE NOONTIME. PRAISE BOOB! PRAISE BOOB! BOOBIE WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN!!!”

Maybe it wouldn’t have been as bad if I were, let’s say… flat.  But I’m not. So our shopping adventure ended with me, with my … ahem… larger chest, ushering my child out of the store while he unknowingly sang an ode to all-day breast access.

If this is any indication of the teen years, lock up your daughters now.

 

 

 

Comments

11 Responses to “Boys Will Be Boys”

  1. Type A Nightmare
    March 11th, 2013 @ 12:20 pm

    Bahahahaha. Love it! This is something my child would do… for sure!

  2. Law Momma
    March 11th, 2013 @ 12:31 pm

    It was… awesomely embarrasing.

  3. Lara Carswell
    March 11th, 2013 @ 3:30 pm

    This is great! My 20 month old son spent the better part of the church service yesterday morning dropping the magnet backing of my nametag down my shirt / bra and then clumsily retrieving it. At least he was being quiet.

  4. lawmomma
    March 11th, 2013 @ 6:43 pm

    LOL!!! Love it. “At least he was being quiet”… hahahahaha

  5. Jackie Henson
    March 12th, 2013 @ 12:49 am

    bahaha awesome! totally busted out laughing 😛

  6. Law Momma
    March 12th, 2013 @ 9:43 am

    MUCH funnier in retrospect… mostly humiliating at the time. 🙂

  7. Jackie Henson
    May 10th, 2013 @ 1:53 pm

    2 months later & I just noticed you responded… fail lol. btw I can totally see how it would be, everything is always funnier later on 🙂

  8. Jo
    March 12th, 2013 @ 9:52 am

    Funniest. Story. Ever. My son’s first word was Boob. Screamed loudly and clearly on a packed airplane. 🙂

  9. Law Momma
    March 12th, 2013 @ 9:58 am

    HA!! Please tell me that he was asking to nurse because EPIC.

  10. Jo
    March 12th, 2013 @ 10:39 pm

    Oh yes. He was mad because he was strapped into a carseat while waiting for takeoff and I wouldn’t get him out to nurse. It’s pretty quiet while you sit there in line too. I’m sure the whole plane heard it! SO humiliating!

  11. Law Momma
    March 18th, 2013 @ 9:19 am

    Amazing. That’s definitely a keeper story… put that on a Groom’s Cake… 🙂

  • Creative Commons License
    Spilled Milk (and Other Atrocities) by Law Momma is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
    Based on a work at http://www.law-momma.com.
  • Twitter

  • Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

  •  


  • Grab my button for your blog!