Posted on | March 19, 2013 | 27 Comments
Sometimes, someone does something so big that it overwhelms you with the sheer kindness of it all. Sometimes, when you’re at your lowest, someone comes along and lifts you up so high that you’d swear your forehead kisses the clouds as they pass. Sometimes someone does something so beautiful that you are faced with the reality that God does exist and he exists in the hands and arms and eyes and hearts of the people around you.
For me, sometime was last week.
It was a rough week, to put it mildly. I’d been in all day mediations for most of the week, some with difficult clients and some with difficult opposing counsels. I’d missed my dates with the gym all week. I started a new diet and was hungry and pissed off about it. And above all the other stress, I was on a tight time frame for making a decision about where my child would attend school next year. His current school is phasing out their 4k program and I don’t want him to start Kindergarten for two more years because he has such a late August birthday, so I was left floundering, wondering where to put him in school and needing a quick solution before spaces filled up at all the options.
My first choice school set up an interview for J and to say that he loved it would be an understatement. He’s been talking about the teacher and the classroom since the day we first set foot out there. I loved it too, until I received the welcome packet and found out how much it was going to cost.
My heart broke in several places, not because there weren’t other options, but because for the first time as a parent, there was something my child wanted and something I wanted for him that I just couldn’t do. There was no way to make it work with my budget… no way at all. I twisted and turned numbers, I discussed borrowing the money, I did everything I could think of to find a way to make it work, but at the end of the day there was just no way to make it happen. And y’all, I’m not ashamed to say that I shed many MANY tears over that fact. Were there other options? Yes. Were they a little more affordable? Only slightly. If you miss the public school lottery around here, your choices are flat out limited for pre-K education.
Finally, I came to grips with the fact that I wasn’t going to be able to put J where we both wanted him to be and I shot off an email to the director to let her know that, while we loved the school, we just couldn’t make it work this year. I asked if there were a way to pay a small deposit this year and hold a spot for next year because, well, that’s where I wanted him to be. I figured one year of saving and cutting corners would allow me to put away some money towards the cost plus my car would be paid off by then and I could find a way to make it work. I expected she’d tell me no, that there was no way to hold a spot for a year. I expected to question my decision again and again and wonder if I could have somehow made it work.
What I didn’t expect was what came next…
The next morning, I sat at my desk and ran through emails before entering yet another mediation. There was one from the director and I sighed inwardly and then opened it, bracing for disappointment and more tears. And yes, there were tears. So very many tears. I cried so hard that my assistant came running into my office because she thought I’d been hurt. But not this time. This time, my tears fell from the overwhelming feeling that I am undeserving of such kindness, such beauty and selflessness, such sweetness from some unexpected source. Someone, somewhere, made an investment in my son’s education. Someone, somewhere, believed that this was the best place for him to be in school, believed that he deserved to be where he most wanted to be and where I most wanted him to learn. Someone, somewhere, made an anonymous contribution towards my son’s education…. enough that the remainder became affordable. Enough that I was overcome by the generosity and the anonymity. Enough that I am still reeling today from the kindness and the care and the overwhelming blessing that came with that email.
Someone, somewhere, has my utmost thanks. Someone, somewhere has no idea what they did for me last week, how they tended my heart, how they mended my soul. Someone, somewhere donned angel’s wings and blessed me beyond belief and for that, all I can say is thank you. And although I can not repay you (for several reasons, the least of which is that I don’t know who you are), I will pay it forward in every way I can.
Angels walk among us, y’all. Everyday. Trust me on that. And when you least expect it, you may just find yourself overwhelmingly blessed.