Monday Rants and Rambles

Posted on | August 26, 2013 | 16 Comments

There are few things that get me as riled up as disrespect… any type of disrespect. I encounter it a lot at home because, you know, my kid is four. I encounter it a lot at work because, you know, I’m a woman… in the South… who’s a lawyer.  I encounter it a lot on behalf of other people, like the gentleman who was basically run down on the road because his motorized wheelchair was apparently moving too slowly for the liking of a man in a truck passing by. Disrespect just… runs rampant these days.

I don’t know if it’s because we are all so focused on ourselves that we forget to focus, even slightly, on others, or if it’s because this world of ours just doesn’t encourage or value respect and courtesy and what used to be called common decency.  For whatever reason, I’ve found that things I always thought were just, I don’t know… common sense? Are not all that common.

On Saturday, I hosted J’s birthday party at my house. It was fun and the weather cooperated and everything turned out fine… except for one small detail: I invited his “old” friends from his preschool along with all of his new class.  In all, I invited about 37 children to his birthday party.


You read that right. I’m THAT much of an idiot.

But he really wanted some of his new friends to come to his party and I just couldn’t stomach inviting a few people and not the whole class because it seemed rude at this age and this early into his new school year. Plus, I figured the odds were, not that many people would want to or be able to come.  The invitations went out via email around the first of August and I asked for RSVPs for the week before the party so I’d know little things… you know, like how many party favors to have, how much food to prepare, how big of a cake I’d need, how much space and chairs and oh, I don’t know… EVERYTHING.

See, RSVP doesn’t mean “let me know, if you feel like it.” It doesn’t mean “Only let me know if you’re coming.” It definitely, 100% does not mean “Just don’t bother responding because I’ll totally be fine with not knowing if I’m going to have 10 or 40 kids attending a party at my house.”

Dis. Re. Spect.


I’m sorry, because I’m sure many people have moments when they just forget to respond.  I’m sure there are times you want to wait and see if you can attend or if your schedule clears up. I’m sure there are a bazillion reasons that people don’t RSVP.

I don’t give a rat’s ass, honestly.

Because imagine, if you will, that you have to pay someone $10 in advance, for every person who might possibly show up for a party. Imagine you have to take into consideration that 25 people may or may not show up at your house to eat your food and take home gifts. Imagine that you have to account for those 25 people EVEN IF THEY DON’T SHOW UP.

Because you do.

Because I did.

And now I have two dozen dinosaur stamps and bubbles and a crap load of tiny plastic buckets just hanging out at my house.

The party was great. J had a great time.

But for the love of all that is holy, people, when an invitation is received that says RSVP, take the time to let the host/hostess know whether or not you’re coming.

That USED to be called “Common” courtesy.


16 Responses to “Monday Rants and Rambles”

  1. Jessie
    August 26th, 2013 @ 10:47 am

    This is also one of my biggest pet peeves. There is no excuse for it ESPECIALLY via email. In asking for no actual interaction with me, just hit reply and give me a yes or a no.

  2. Law Momma
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:17 pm


  3. Joanna
    August 26th, 2013 @ 10:52 am

    I totally agree. I give my email address on invitations because I feel like we are ALL on computers or smart phones at some point… just shoot me a quick email!

  4. Law Momma
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:17 pm

    Right! You don’t have to actually speak to me at all! Just shoot me an email!

  5. NinjaPanza
    August 26th, 2013 @ 11:31 am

    Yuck! Birthday parties are stressful enough, and you’d think parents of fellow four year olds would get that!!

  6. Law Momma
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:16 pm

    You would think…

  7. Lauren
    August 26th, 2013 @ 12:14 pm

    I am with you. I cannot stand it when people don’t RSVP, especially when all it takes is a quick email. Super rude.

  8. Law Momma
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:16 pm

    I just hate the over-preparing! I mean… that’s a ton of wasted money.

  9. KurtnAmanda Ward
    August 26th, 2013 @ 12:47 pm

    I’ve had a friendship end over this! I posted something similar to this blog on my FB after one of my kid’s parties and those who knew I was talking about them got all pissy that I would call them out on their lack of respect and we couldn’t agree on the fact that they sucked so we ended our friendship.

  10. Law Momma
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:16 pm

    Ah well… with friends like those… 😉

  11. Tara@dothesekidsmakemelookcraz
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:35 pm

    Ugh. The favor bags. It would be SO much easier if we’d all sign a treaty and acknowledge that those are the stupidest things ever. I mean 20 extra bags…what the hell are they going to be used for? NOTHING. 20 extra pieces of cake, however? I can find someplace to put that.

  12. Law Momma
    August 26th, 2013 @ 2:44 pm

    Seriously. I’m such an overachiever.

  13. Rick O
    August 26th, 2013 @ 5:46 pm

    if you have a local shelter where women in crisis go … when they require a fresh start, they may be able to put some of the extra toys to good use … and the donation may help reduce the sting.

  14. Roxanne Piskel
    August 27th, 2013 @ 7:08 pm

    Yes. This. A million times, YES.

    Also? Don’t show up with extra people that weren’t invited unless you’ve asked the host/ess. Because obvious reasons.

  15. KeAnne
    August 28th, 2013 @ 8:22 am

    That sucks. We encountered the same thing for D’s party. Invitations to the entire class well in advance. I never heard from some. One mom emailed me the day of the party to see if her son could come. From talking to other moms in his class, the lack of RSVPing is all too common.

  16. TarynB
    September 6th, 2013 @ 12:32 pm

    Ugh. I just had this happen with L’s party… we had invited friends from the neighborhood plus 10 kids from his VPK class to ChuckECheese. I had rsvp’s for 10 kids (this included my 2.) I didn’t get an rsvp from a single person in his class. And you know how many kids actually showed up?? 6. 2 of the 4 that didn’t show up were ones that RSVP’d!! Are you kidding me?? I was so pissed. Thank god I had preordered extra pizza since we had a TON of adults there. And ChcukECheese only made me pay for 8 people instead of 10. Fricking ridiculous.

  • Creative Commons License
    Spilled Milk (and Other Atrocities) by Law Momma is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
    Based on a work at
  • Twitter

  • Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner


  • Grab my button for your blog!