Locked Out

Yesterday I did something I’ve never done in my life. J was sitting on the sofa, begging for some play time on the iPad or something different on television or even the use of my cell phone. I was getting frustrated. He has a room full of books and toys and none of them were […]

Thinking Out Loud

Yesterday, I promised my son frozen yogurt after school. I wasn’t feeling well and the thought of soft serve frozen yogurt sounded like perfection on my throat. We drove the short distance to a store, pulled in, and trouble started. Closed. No problem, I told J. There’s another one near my office. So we hit […]

I Fart in Your General Direction

My kid likes the word “butt.” No, correction… my kid likes any word associated with the word “butt”, any word that rhymes with the word butt, and any word that could be substituted with the word “butt.” For example, our conversations often go like this: Me: “J, go get your clothes on.” J: “You go […]

Marking “Maybe”

I get a lot of Facebook invitations. You know the ones I mean, the cool art gallery openings and the funky brass band playing downtown? The exhibit on the history of my town, the Superbowl party, or maybe a bar-hopping birthday party. Every single one looks awesome. Each one that pops up on my feed […]

Teetering

“These are baby socks!” He tossed them away, refusing to put them on his feet. I tried everything I could to convince him they were regular, normal, socks but he just wasn’t having it. He refused to wear them this weekend, opting instead for his Crocs that required no socks.  The next day it was […]

Making the Tough Choices

“Mom, will you play a game with me?” The voice was muffled from his distance outside my bedroom and the sleep still clouding my ears. I slowly rolled over and checked the clock: ten minutes until my alarm would go off. I think I grunted in response but my feet found the cool hardwood floor […]

Packed for Disaster

Sometime over Christmas break, J developed what he calls his “disaster kit.” It’s basically a tote bag that has a variety of items in it, such as sun screen, chapstick, a map, a guidebook to Barcelona, a flashlight, and various other random things. He carries it… everywhere… and at first it was a little annoying. […]

I Do Not Think It Means What You Think It Means…

You know how they say that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results? Yeah… I’m pretty sure whoever coined that phrase was a parent and what they meant was, quite simply, that parents are insane. Because I find myself daily in situations where I’m asking […]

25 Days of Christmas

I love Christmas. I love the magic and the candlelight and the love and the full on explosion of good moods across, well, everything. And because I love Christmas so much, last year I started this idea of doing 25 days of Christmas with J. Each day, we’d do something else Christmasy. I’d bake or […]

Five

So I have to admit that I lied to y’all. Because I’m pretty sure that at some point in the past I said something like “this is my favorite age” or something similar about some age that is not five. And I was a liar. Because this time of year with a five year old […]

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    Spilled Milk (and Other Atrocities) by Law Momma is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
    Based on a work at http://www.law-momma.com.



  • I'm a divorced, single mom to a pre-schooler, a full-time attorney, and a semi-reluctant vegetarian. I work hard and when given the chance, I play hard... but I'm almost never given the chance.

    It's possible that I never outgrew 7th grade mentality, as I still laugh when anyone says anything that can be remotely construed as sexual. Let's face it, if you're not down with "That's what s/he said" at the end of almost any sentence, we're probably not going to get along all that well.

    I drink more than I should, I run more than I should, and I laugh as much as I can. So I'm pretty much winning at life.

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