I am Strong (strong) I am Invincible (invincible)

Posted on | August 12, 2010 | 13 Comments

I AM WOMAN!!!

Thanks, Helen Reddy, for summing up my Wednesday. I. Freaking. DID IT.  Were there some speed bumps… yes. Would I do it again? Oh HELL no. But I did it.

Want the full story? Too bad. I’m giving it to you. J slept pretty good on Tuesday night but I did not. I was so terrified that I would oversleep and miss my flight that I woke up pretty much every 45 minutes. Around 4:30, I got up and showered and then by 5:15, Husband had J up and eating breakfast. We were out the door by 5:45 which was slightly later than I had intended. This came back to haunt me around 6:20 when I was COMPLETELY LOST.

Side note? Mapquest can bite me. I had the directions all written out and pretty and um, hello? THAT ROAD DOESN’T EXIST. I drove all around the airport. Seriously, I could flat out SEE the runway. But I couldn’t get to it. I thought momentarily about parking and hopping a fence, but I couldn’t figure out how to hoist J over without some form of serious injury to both of us. Finally I called Husband in a complete panic only to find that the next street said “Airport Thattaway.” I turned, well, thattaway. That put me circling back around my ass to get to my elbow but I made it. Just about the time the gas light clicked on. And also just about the time my plane was beginning to board. Luckily, there is valet parking at the airport.

Is this an every airport thing or just Savannah? Am I just too poor to have noticed it before? It saved my butt today. I left the car running, popped the trunk open, slammed open the stroller, threw gently placed J in the stroller and hauled ass to my gate. Did I mention I hadn’t had any caffeine? Yeah.

Luckily there was a Starbucks right at my gate. Unluckily about the time I took my first sip, they wanted me to board with J. And I do not possess the skills necessary to hold J, a diaper bag, my boarding pass, my suit jacket, and a cup of hot coffee. Although I thought momentarily about dumping the diaper bag, ultimately the coffee had to go.

J was absolutely wonderful on the plane. We were fortunate to have an entire row of seats to ourselves so he had room to move around. The rest of the passengers were mostly business travelers and they were less than impressed with my son’s attempts to win them over by blowing kisses. In fact, not one person even acknowledged him… until he reached through the seat in front of us and pulled the lady’s hair. Mom fail on that one. Can’t take your eyes off those busy hands for even a second!!

So we made it up to Atlanta without any real difficulty and even managed to find the MARTA station. Then trouble set in. I forgot to ask anyone which train I needed to take. This would not have been a major problem since my firm provided me with a cell phone on hire… only I could see that phone quite vividly in my head… sitting on the passenger side seat in my valet parked car… in Savannah. So a choice had to be made and originally? I chose well. I hopped onto the Red line and stared blankly at a map. A well-meaning stranger asked if he could help and I explained where I was going. He directed me to get off the Red Line and onto the Gold Line.

SCREW YOU RANDOM STRANGER!!!

I took the Gold Line, at his instruction, to the Lenox station. I left the MARTA station and looked around. This was not what I was thinking I’d see. As it turned out, it was also not where I was supposed to be. I should have taken the Buckhead exit off the Red Line. I could get to my office, I knew where it was, but it was a HAUL. And it was so. effing. hot. By the time I walked into my office building, I was sweating like a whore in church. It was horrible. And my hair that I so nicely straightened? Was poofed out like I teased it six ways from Sunday.

Other than the MARTA trip, which also included some guy asking for money so he could buy a prescription medicine to heal the infectious sores he got in prison… (Side note, really dude? I don’t want to get close enough to hand you money if you tell me you have infectious sores), the rest of the trip was pretty uneventful. J was amazing all day long and even took a long nap with the girl who babysat him at the office.

We were lucky enough to get an empty row for the flight back and he was great on that, as well. In fact, he really didn’t cry at all until we were about 15 minutes from the house and then a good, loud, rendition of Wheels on the Bus knocked him right out. He was so tired he slept straight through taking him out of the car and putting him into bed.

And bonus? I came home to dinner, wine and a dozen roses.

And work to do. What can I say? A Superhero’s work is never done.

Comments

13 Responses to “I am Strong (strong) I am Invincible (invincible)”

  1. elizabeth
    August 12th, 2010 @ 10:46 am

    you're my inspiration.

  2. Kiki
    August 12th, 2010 @ 10:51 am

    Well Done – you must have been exhauted by the end of the day but what a blessing that J was so well behaved – I think he must have picked up that he needed to be 🙂

  3. Maija's Mommy Moments
    August 12th, 2010 @ 11:27 am

    WOW! I bow to your superhero mommy-ing abilities. Congratulations!

  4. Suzanne
    August 12th, 2010 @ 12:34 pm

    That is really, really impressive. I would have been in tears the moment I realized I left my cell phone in the car. Seriously, just reading that part stressed me out so much I need to go lie down.

  5. Beauty
    August 12th, 2010 @ 12:58 pm

    Wow is right! Go ahead and brush that supermom cape off because you rock.

  6. D
    August 12th, 2010 @ 1:53 pm

    :::Appauds loudly while giving standing ovation:::

  7. KLZ
    August 12th, 2010 @ 3:27 pm

    This sounds like a feat of strength great enough for you to win Festivus 4 months ahead of schedule.

    Congrats on a smooth-ish trip.

  8. Anne
    August 12th, 2010 @ 4:21 pm

    Great job! I am impressed with you, for real.

    Glad J was an angel too 🙂

  9. Eliza
    August 12th, 2010 @ 4:29 pm

    Aw, holy hell….you are amazing. I simply don't know how you do/did it! Amazing. Super human.

  10. KSBA
    August 12th, 2010 @ 9:16 pm

    You friggin rock, tap the t-box my friend! 🙂

  11. Alex's Mommy
    August 13th, 2010 @ 1:49 pm

    You are the epitomy of the expression "Super Mom"!

  12. Christine @ SugarPlumTreasures
    August 13th, 2010 @ 10:35 pm

    If you only got lost on Marta once you are my hero! I do my absolute best to avoid it – and usually end up lost at least once.

  13. mae
    October 4th, 2010 @ 2:13 pm

    I was about to beat myself up for missing this whole saga in real time but then I realized, I was on vacation! Phew!

    THIS IS ALL FREAKING AMAZING. I AM IN AWE OF YOU.

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    Spilled Milk (and Other Atrocities) by Law Momma is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
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