Diapers, Disasters and Delicious Goodies…

Posted on | May 14, 2012 | 5 Comments

Traveling with a toddler is always a unique experience…. no two trips are the same but they are always a lesson in patience, endurance, and ingenuity.

This trip was no different.

J and I set out on Thursday night, driving up to just north of Atlanta to see my brother and cut the trip into portions to best serve my herniated disc.  We spent the night in a lovely Courtyard Marriott in Vinings and then had breakfast with my bro at the Silver Skillet in Atlanta on Friday morning before heading out.

The real fun began when we arrived in Charlotte.

Friday night, J and I had dinner with my friend Jen’s husband and sweet daughter and then hit up the hotel for a late bedtime of 9 pm.  After J was sound asleep I realized that I had left all of my tampons down in the hotel parking lot… some five floors below.  What to do, what to do.

I thought briefly about running down to the parking lot and leaving J sleeping in the bed but I ruled that out for two reasons… one, my kid is too young to be left alone, even asleep (I kept thinking about that kid in Aruba or wherever who was taken from the hotel room); and two, I was too lazy to put on a bra and TRUST me, these things need containment if in public.  For a few moments, I just stood in the room and mentally spun in circles.  Have I mentioned I’m a hypochondriac? All I kept thinking was Toxic Shock Syndrome.  I could literally feel the toxicity creeping through my veins and I just knew if I didn’t do something fast, I was going to flat out die from some sort of blood poisoning. (Thanks, Google.)  Rather than planning my classy, yet tender funeral,  I did the only thing I could think of…

I put on one of my kid’s diapers.

Yep. You read that right.  I opened up a pull-up and put that sucker in my undies.  Like the giant hospital-grade maxi pads they give you after birth.  

Step One of Single Parent Toddler Travel: wear a mother effing diaper to bed.

My parents came to help with J and had the adjoining room in the hotel so we propped the doors open between the two rooms and let J flit between both while I got dressed for the shower.  Once I was fully made-up and ready, I pulled all of J and I’s things out of our room and into my parents’ because we’d be sleeping in that room for Saturday night.  I swung the adjoining door closed without a second thought.

Until housekeeping knocked.

It seems I had forgotten to move the little safety lock… you know, the one that you can only put on from INSIDE the room? The one that flips closed across the door and prevents anyone from just waltzing in, even if they have  key?   The one that is necessary to keep a toddler inside a hotel room because he knows how to open doors?

Yeah.  That one.

Step Two: lock housekeeping out of a hotel room.

The shower itself was a rousing success.  I got to see four of my favorite women on the planet, two of whom are pregnant, and got to spend time with four of my favorite mini-people on the planet… their kids. 

The Golden Girls
If  you know me at all, you know that I am NOT artsy-fartsy.  I do not do crafts, I do not Pinterest for any reason other than to gawk in awe at what other people can do, and I do NOT fancy myself to be any type of culinary genius.  I say this because I did something pretty sweet for this shower…. I made chocolate covered, cherry blossom decorated oreos… on sticks.  As shower favors.  This could only be described as so freaking epic that my interior design shower honoree thought they were store bought and upon finding out that I made them, shock was apparent in her disbelieving “YOU made these??”   I’ve pretty much been aching to share them since I made them but had to wait…


So that part was a success, but then there was still the trip back.  Which brings us to step three…
Step Three: Have your Toddler break the in-Car DVD player thirty minutes into a four plus hour drive.
I can’t talk about that portion of my trip or I will have Vietnam Veteran worthy flashbacks.
But ultimately, we survived.  (Even the Indian Wedding Reception going on in the lobby of my hotel that made the whole place smell like something awesome happened to a goat and some rice). And now we’re home in Macon, ready to face another week of madness.  And the trip was totally worth it just for the following picture…

The Golden Girls make cute babies.



5 Responses to “Diapers, Disasters and Delicious Goodies…”

  1. KeAnne
    May 14th, 2012 @ 11:29 am

    I am very impressed by the favors you made! Great job! Your trip sounds like it was quite an adventure; at the very least, you have some good stories to tell. Love the picture of the kids. You all do make beautiful babies!

  2. Law Momma
    May 14th, 2012 @ 11:48 am

    The kids getting together was totally worth it… even the diaper. Though I won’t be that stupid again.

  3. Heather Griffitts Clark
    May 14th, 2012 @ 12:07 pm

    Dude….whatever it takes. Don’t think I’m not keeping the diaper trick in the back of my mind if I’m in a pinch.

  4. Lawmomma77
    May 14th, 2012 @ 4:06 pm

    LOL! My mom was totally grossed out when I told her.

  5. Jackie Henson
    May 14th, 2012 @ 4:20 pm

    rofl the diaper thing is awesome! you do what you gotta do when your in a crunch 😛

    those kiddos are adorable! sounds like a very fun trip minus breaking of dvd players 🙂

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    Spilled Milk (and Other Atrocities) by Law Momma is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
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